Last Day.... Sort Of....

My wildest fears are coming true. I knew this would happen one day!

Alright. So, today was the last day of school, meaning I am the most relieved and care-free girl in all the world. Except for the fact that I must return to school tomorrow to finish returning some stuff to my bio teacher, and get an AP text book. And for the fact that I have three (possibly four) summer assignments. And that I have this sinking feeling that I'm not the person I'd like to be. But that part is minor at the moment.

I'm terribly afraid that I'm going to be bored all summer. I have hardly any tolerance for boredom! None! At all! So I'm thinking up a huge list of things I can do this summer to keep me from my dark, depressed, uninterested corners of my mind.

- starting yoga at the Y. And possibly start going to the gym there.
- hunting on E-bay for a treadmill
- clean out my basement
- clean out my room (and possibly try to locate all the belongings of my recent ex...)
- get into my fencing club's camp
- see if I'm actually doing this fencing job, teaching these kids
- trips to the city
- working in the bead store a lot
- bead more
- write some letters to people I miss but can't call
- blog!
- keep up with photography and continue my journal
- start a photo album
- try to avoid being on the computer for more than an hour a day (because I really should be doing better stuff with my youth)
- have some parties
- open a bank account
- locate 6 points of identification for my learner's permit

This is Shit to Do - Part I. If anyone stumbling upon this and taking time to read it, suggest more things if you'd like!

Seriously, I love getting e-mails from people. Some people are like 'yeah, facebook me! send me emails! i love to hear from people!' but you get the vibe that if they do, you'll freak them out? Yeah, not me. I'm impossible to freak out mostly (thats not a challenge) ....(or is it?) ..... (no really, its not).

Lately I've been feeling like I'm wasting time being tired and fed up with all the dysfunction of my family. Like I should get out there and start something myself, entertain myself. But sometimes thats so hard. School I feel is sometime I'm getting through. And ever time I think that, it makes me hate the way I live! High school is four years. Four years! thats a crazy amount of time to just be getting by. Or just putting your head down and getting through it.

So I've been looking for some changes, like a recent break up with someone I love, but I'm simply not happy with anymore. People keep asking why, and I'm getting tired of explaining. I don't need them to know why, I know why. Thats it. This is my radical, close to failed attempt at being independent and enjoying my last year of high school.

Well I'm done rambling. Lemme know what you're thinking about time and boredom or anything at all.

Peace World.